Spider-Ham

Spider-Ham, the spider that was bitten by a radioactive pig. In a universe where all people are sentient animal cartoon characters, May Porker is a super genius pig who built a radioactive hairdryer that put her in a radioactive daze, whereupon she bit a spider, transferring both her pig genes and super genius but leaving his spider-abilities. Now pretending to be her beloved nephew,
Peter Porker secretly fights crime as Spider-Ham against villains like Ducktor Doom and I only ever read one issue so I don’t know. Anyway, Spider-Ham was a barely remembered children’s comic from the 80s trotted out for nostalgia cameos until the Spider-verse story brought him into the mainstream and our current love for whimsy made him a star! He’s made numerous appearances in the current Spider-man cartoon and is going to appear in the new animated movie voiced by stand-up colossus John Mulaney.

And his Marvel Legend figure sucks! Above the waist he has typical Marvel Legend articulation but everything below the waist is a solid piece of plastic. I would have passed this figure up entirely but he comes with a Pig Venom head to make Pork Grind, his comics version of Venom. I assumed it was meant to go on the Monster Venom Build-A-Figure piece, but it didn’t fit. And it didn’t fit the Spider-ham figure... but it did fit the regular Venom figure... which already had an alternate head. It’s fine, Pork Grind is meant to be a lot bigger than Spider-ham, but I kinda wanted super-oversized Pig Venom.

Buyer's Remorse Prof X edition

Did I buy it because I really wanted it or because I saw a couple Prof X & Jubilee figures on the shelf and wanted to buy one for proof?

Or did I buy it to put Admiral Ackbar in a floating wheelchair?

Uncanny X-men

As much as I want a Baby Cyclops figure, i can't justify paying $25 for him if the only other figure in the set I'm even kinda interested in getting is Longshot.

Beast (Marvel Universe)

I didn't much in the way of toys this Christmas--in fact, Marvel Universe Beast here was the only action figure I received as a gift (from good ol' Mario). Having already built a collection of 5-inch and 6-inch scale Marvel toys, I've been pretty reluctant to delve much into Hasbro's 4-inch Marvel Universe line. The few offerings from the line I do possess are either figures I don't have in a larger form, are larger than average, or have a largely unique sculpt (or cover all three criteria).

Beast definitely fits all three descriptions. Based on Simone Bianchi's artwork for his run on Astonishing X-Men with Warren Ellis, this four-fingered cat-faced incarnation of Beast in a heavily detailed costume is unlikely to lend pieces to easy reuse. And I like that. The sculpt itself is nicely detailed, and the way the hands are designed gives posing the arms a nice infusion of character.

There's two quibbles I have with this figure (well, three: because the way it was packaged the right leg now curves inward, but I don't know if that's commonplace or just a fluke). While most of the costume details are sculpted on, the yellow piping on Beast's lower back is painted. Usually painted details are a sure sign that a part of a figure is liable to be reused for another--except that the lines on front of the piece are raised, and the combination of Beast's proportions and Bianchi's costuming makes for a pretty distinctive combination. Less odd and more vexing is the hip articulation, which makes forward leg movement frustratingly difficult. Judging by other Marvel Universe offerings I own, this seems to be a common design flaw.

Though not everyone is a fan of cat-Beast, I enjoy the design largely due to its origins in Gran Morrison's New X-Men run in the early 2000s. Coupled with an above-average size (he's taller than my Extremis Iron Man, but shorter and much less bulkier than my Thanos) and a great original sculpt, Beast ends up being a very rewarding holiday gift.

Beta-Ray Bill

Somewhere, there are people demanding more toys of anthropomorphic space horses. I am one of those people. So good thing they made a Marvel Universe Beta-Ray Bill figure. For all the 4 inches of space horse alien goodness a person can handle. Because space horse. Now with removable cape.

Beta-Ray Bill, proving that Norse mythology would have been better with space aliens.

Avengers vs. X-men minimate fan poll

Can anyone else vote on the Toys R Us Avengers vs. X-men minimate fan poll? I can't, but I wonder if I should try again later in the day/week.

Unlike last year's Heralds of Galactus poll, I don't really have a horse in this race. Picking 4 out of 6 minimates for a box set is less exciting if I've already got minimates of most of the characters already. So the new costumes they're wearing better be impressive. I'll just vote for whatever looks cool. But first I need to see better pictures of the prototypes.

I feel like I'm probably going to pick the ridiculous anti-Phoenix Iron Man armor. Also the Phoenix powered X-men look like they might be groovy.

Guardians of the Galaxy.

Hell, they were $4. And for that you get Star Lord, who I know almost nothing about, and Drax the Destroyer, about which I know a little but mostly from the 90's before he transformed into the look he has here during the Annihilation miniseries. They're both good figures, especially if you're paying $2 for each of them. Starlord is cool, in that his helmet makes him look like an awesome cyborg. Like I said, I'm not familiar with the character so he could be a cyborg, but from what I can recall, I think he's just some human who accidentally got stuck in a space opera back in the 70's. And then there's Drax. I like Drax's knives, they serve the character well. (I did read the Annihilation comic, but all you need to know about Drax is that he was created by cosmic forces from a dead human to kill Thanos the mad Titan, a guy who worshiped death and would regularly gain control over all of reality. He used to be stupid and insanely strong, but then he evolved to be less strong but insanely more cunning and clever about killing people.)

Of course the real stars of this set are the two accessories. Rocket Racoon and Groot. I hesitate to say that they're figures in the set because Groot has no articulation and Rocket racoon has two points of articulation: a ball jointed head and a cut joint where his tail meets his torso. So you can spin his tail around and make him look up, down, or side to side. Other than that, he's stuck in one pose... You know... like a statue. So that's why I consider them accessories and not action figures. Because they lack action.

Thanos (Marvel Universe)

Two weeks ago I visited a collectible toy store in Sacramento that was having a sidewalk sale featuring independent vendors. I scored some sweet DC Universe Classics and McFarlane NFL deals for my brother, but I wavered quite a bit when it came time for me to pick out my purchases. I ultimately settled on this Marvel Universe figure of the cosmic villain Thanos, which was available for a pretty favorable seven dollars, about a buck cheaper than at retail. This was quite a catch, given the figure has been particularly difficult to track down in stores during the year or so it's been out.

I'm very glad I chose Thanos, as it's a superb figure. Sharing a basic sculpt with the earlier Juggernaut figure from the line, the Mad Titan is a very hefty offering for the price point, coming in at around twice the size of my Tony Stark Iron Man, the only other Marvel Universe toy I own. He's very well-articulated, though his hips are difficult to pose. In addition to the standard display base (he really doesn't need it--he has no trouble standing fine on his own), Thanos comes with a proper accessory: an interchangeable Infinity Gauntlet! It's easy to swap out with the standard gloved fist, and given the figure's size, its inclusion makes this purchase all the more satisfying. I'm not hankering to collect Marvel Universe beyond a few standout items (I've already got enough Marvel toys in 5" and 6" scales), but this well-sculpted and totally fun Thanos is definitely one of those. Track it down if you can find it.