Stephen King

Series 3 of the Simpsons 25 Greatest Guest Stars is out. I've been waiting for this wave since they announced the line-up, and while I'm tempted by Penn & Teller and Leonard Nimoy, it was the Stephen King figure that originally got me excited and so of course that was the one I purchased today.

Making an action figure of an author is rare, usually it's done ironically. (I'm looking at you Accoutrement Toys.) Potentially it's done for a very small but dedicated collector's market. But you know what never happens: releasing the figure of the author in a mass market line. But the most popular and prolific storyteller of the modern age changes that. And I am glad.

Also, he comes with a book. Which is meaningless to me since I have no plans of opening this thing. It goes on the wall with my other 2 figures from this line, which is really setting up an odd trend for me. I wonder if I'll buy a single figure from Wave 4 not because I want it but out of habit.

Richard Nixon

When I got back into 1:6 scale figures, I knew I was going to get this figure eventually. He's not just a President, he's Richard F-ING Nixon. He was made as part of the "Talking Presidents" line of 1:6 scale figures. It's kinda odd really, even if you're into Conservatives, Nixon's one of the most notorious Presidents of all time. The whole part where he broke the law and almost brought down the respectability of the office is kind of important.

Which is why this figure's accessories and packaging mystify me. Like all the Talking Presidents figures he comes with a 3 foot long timeline of his life. Oddly enough the timeline fails to denote Watergate, or his resigning from office. It lists him being elected, him being re-elected, then notes that he gave an interview where he talked about Watergate. It's like the thing was written by the old Nixon Presidential library. Back when it was run not by a federal agency but a private group associated with Nixon, the library pretty much ignored anything negative about Nixon, completely pretending that Watergate never happened. I can't say I'd blame him, if I had my own Presidential library it would have a display of me fighting animatronic dinosaurs.

The figure itself is a pretty standard 1:6 scale figure. Articulation is plentiful but limited, and the suit prevents the arms from attaining their full posing potential. (Which is similar to real suits.) He only comes with one set of hands, and they're permanently posed in his famous "Victory" gesture. If you bring them over his head, like he used to do, his entire suit scrunches up around his neck just like it did in real life. It's an odd coincidence... or AMAZINGLY LIFELIKE DESIGN.

I'm glad I got him for a semi-reasonable price. It's insane to me that this figure, when it can be found on e-Bay, goes for $90 or so.

Joseph Stalin

There's something in my head that won't let me buy an action figure of a living historical figure if the atrocities they committed are recent enough that joking about them wouldn't get you a shout of, "Too Soon!" Joseph Stalin is not one of those people.

One of history's greatest monsters, and King's Toys made an action figure of him in the 1:6 scale. Then someone was selling a loose version for cheap on ebay and I picked it up even though it was nude. However that person was also selling the clothing in an alternate auction, so I picked up what I thought was his most iconic outfit. No shoes though, bastard can go barefoot.

I'm not certain how I want to pose this guy. Preferably in a way that takes the piss out of him. Because making fun of Stalin is hilarious.

Hello comrade, can you spare change so I can eat cupcakes?

Albert Einstein

Continuing my obsession with specific historical figures in one sixth scale, it's Albert Einstein. There was a photorealistic 1:6 version of Einstein, but it goes for like $500 now. So screw that. So instead I got the version of Einstein from Toy Presidents. Had to get it used, of course, it's long been out of production. (Incidentally, the limited edition run information says I got #12.) This is still recognizably Einstein, but it has a little more of a caricature-esque head sculpt. I'm okay with that though. It's a good head sculpt and I'm not paying $500 just for an accurate looking head. Also, this guy has a suit on, the $500 is wearing what looks like a sweater he got for Christmas, you know... if Einstein got Christmas presents, which is unlikely because he was Jewish.

The figure comes with a stand and a timeline of Einstein's life.

The weird thing for me is the way his coat hangs on his body. It ends up restricting his shoulder articulation a little, preventing him from raising his arms very high. Also, when he does raise his arms, it looks like he has shoulders in the middle of his torso. Weird.

Herbert Hoover holding a lightsaber

Barbie MyScene Scooter

I bought a Barbie MyScene Vespa scooter off of eBay. Why?

Because some Barbie accessories are in scale with 12 inch figures! (Although not so the Barbie clothing, which is a shame.)

Abraham Lincoln

Because I slid back into 12" figures because of a good 1:6 scale President, I knew if I was getting more then I'd have to find other high quality President figures. Fortunately they made one of the most iconic ever and it was by Sideshow, the like #2 name in 1:6 scale figures. And even more fortunately I found it at the price point I was comfortable with (Not paying $100 for a Sideshow version of Grant or Washington.)

As the packaging implies, President Lincoln was released as part of a set of Civil War figures. Other famous historical figures: Stonewall Jackson, General/Future President Grant, and a bunch of soldiers I don't know because I'm not a Civil War buff and most of what I Know is a result of text books and that PBS Documentary by Ken Burns.

I will say that I'm glad they released this figure as Bearded Lincoln and not young weird looking Lincoln.

Since this is a Civil War based set, Lincoln he comes with appropriate accessories. He gets two mini version of the Gettysburg Address written on what feel like easily tearable paper and his iconic stovepipe hat.

And that's it.

Well, unless you count the stand he's packaged with. Or his clothing. But I don't. So he gets two pieces of paper that I'm never taking out of the box and a hat.

Although as far as hats go, it's a pretty good one. Very solid and stays attached to the head more than you would fear when put it on. Overall: Happy with the product and now I want more action figures of Presidents in this scale and of this quality.

Hot Toys True Type African American

So you may have heard of this figure. If you have, it's probably for the same reason I bought it. Because it was designed to pay more than a passing resemblance to President Obama. So sometime around a month ago I took my spare change to the coinstar and got an Amazon certificate and somehow got it into my head that I really wanted an accurate-ish looking action figure of a President, especially a recent one I think is pretty cool. Then I thought, hey, you know what would be cool, if I could get one that could be posed with my Jesse Ventura 12 inch figure.

So the combination of these factors had me looking for accurately sculpted Obama figures, and this was one of the best. (The others were okay, but not good.) The likeness isn't 100%, but at the right angles and with the right lighting it looks great.

He's a Hot Toy buck body, so that means 1) I now have a sense what a Hot Toy body is like, and 2) it came fully nude without any clothing or accessories. That is not a state I want to see a representation of the President in.

So I had to get some clothing for the figure. Which means starting to look at 1:6 scale clothing. Turns out that the cheapest way to get 1:6 scale clothing is to either buy Barbie doll clothing or find cheap, old 12 inch figures no body wants and strip them for clothes. Which is why I got those Star Wars figures at that toy sale.

Sadly it turns out the clothes on the Kenner 12" figures are a bit small. The pants barely fit on the Obama figure and they cut off at the shins, looking like Jedi capri pants. And I could barely get Han Solo's shirt & vest on him. The pants were pretty much out. So it looks like I'll have to go shopping for some cheap 1:6 scale clothing for the President.

And I gotta say, this purchase has me fascinated with 12" figures again. I get that urge every few years. I look a little closer at the Barbie aisle and such. Although now that I've seen this Hot Toy and how the head sculpting is, and have been reminded recently of how crap the Barbie & old Kenner 12" figures actually are, I find myself looking more at the 1:6 collectible market of Sideshow, Triad and Hot Toys. We'll see how that turns out.

Elvis

So let's start of with me mentioning that I'm not opening the box on this. I think that's going to be a standard on all these Funko Pop! vinyls I get. Partially because when you look at them in the box it's pretty much the same as they'll look out of the box, but with the bonus of getting the neat Pop-Art style box.

But enough about that. Elvis. I love the iconography of Elvis. His music is nice, but the legend, the symbol, that is amazing. There's a two different Elvis designs in the Funko Pop! line but the only one that really screamed: ELVIS to me is his sequined jumpsuit from the 70's. I like that era Elvis more than the young 50's style. It's more ostentatious and ridiculous! It is ROCK MUSIC!

Lil' Ludwig Van Beethoven

You remember Lil' Ludwig from my big Accoutrement Toys bag from way back? Sure you do. Well he's a three inch figure, a scale I'm slowly building an appreciation for thanks to Playmobil and-

HE BRINGS YOU A SYMPHONY OF PAIN!

YOUR CRIES FOR MERCY FALL ON DEAF EARS!!

Ghostbuster 2 Egon & Titantic Ghost

Let's get this out of the way, I don't care about the Egon figure. I've already got an Egon minimate and don't need Egon in another uniform to make me happy. In fact it feels like a waste of an opportunity to get another minimate I might want, but this is how he was packaged so I'll live with it.

But what I do want is the Titantic ghost. Based on the one scene in Ghostbusters 2 when the ghost of the Titantic and its many victims (that sounds like the Titantic attacked them) finally dock in New York. The Captain wasn't one of the ghosts seen, but it certainly seems likely he was there. (Incidentally Cheech Marin was in that scene, with the one liner "Well, better late than never." Oh just watch.)

So you want to know why I want this minimate even though the ghost never appeared in Ghostbusters 2? It's beause that means they made a minimate of the ghost of a Real Person: Captain Edward John Smith, for no other reason than the fact that he's the most recognizable Titantic person they could come up with.

That's insane. So yeah, want that minimate.

Lil Edgar Allan Poe

Obviously Lil Edgar, part of Accoutrements Toys Lil Genius line, is based on Edgar Allan Poe. This is rad because Edgar Allan Poe basically created the mystery genre, popularized horror literature, is arguably the greatest American writer of all time, and wrote some of the greatest literature ever.

He was also the subject of one of the best songs from the Broadway musical Snoopy, which was then adapted to an animated television special. The best song from Snoopy is probably "Just One Person," but Edgar Allan Poe has the benefit of actually teaching people while using a catchy tune. EDUTAINMENT!



Where was I? Oh yeah, they made an Edgar Allan Poe mini-figure!

The reason I like these "Lil" figures is that they're in scale with so many mini-figures. Which leads to all sorts of hijinks that Edgar Allan Poe can take part in.

Archie McPhee Surprise Bag, pt. 3

Okay, let's get to the part that can generously be called: The only reason I thought it might be worth it to buy the surprise pack. That's the novelty action figures that Archie McPhee sells.

Li'L Ludwig and Li'L Wolfgang: Part of the Li'L genius series. I'm more tempted by the first series which featured writers, but I think those are out of stock. These guys are pretty neat though. Minifigures based on famous composers. And ones I can recognize and sort of respect. The likeness isn't something you'd get right away, but I think they're striking in their own right. Plus I can now say I own a Beethoven figure.

I would have paid: $2.50 each.

Cubes Corporate Protester and Motivational Speaker: I don't own that many of the Cubes action figures, but I really like the concept behind them. Basically you get a small minifigure dressed like an office drone and accessories that you can use to make a work cubicle complete with bad posters and office scenery. These two guys are part of the expanion packs so you can fill your office with more workers and office archetypes. I've actually wanted the Motivational Speaker for quite a while and have been eyeing the Corporate Protester, partially because I'm pretty sure their accessories would be in scale with the PALZ figures I've accumulated. So big excitement that both of these guys are in this surprise bag.

I would have paid: $5 for the Motivational Speaker, $3.50 for the Corporate Protester.

Casanova Action Figure: Here's the thing about the Accoutrements action figures, they're not very good. The articulation is limited, the accessories don't actually fit in their hands, and the likeness is varied in accuracy. They mostly get by based on the novelty value of someone making an action figure of either a historical figure or a mundane occupation. In essence they're ironic action figures, except for people who are really into a certain subject will buy a lot of them. (Librarians around the country LOVE the Librarian action figure. Seriously, go to any library and there's a 75% chance that someone on staff will own one and a 60% chance that they've displayed it in the office.)

The other side of that is that if you have no interest in the subject matter, if you don't care that they made an action figure of the subject, then these action figures have very little value. Which is how I feel about Casanova.

I would have paid: $1.50

Wagner Action Figure: I work with someone who has this displayed at work. I know that the conductor's wand doesn't stay in his hand unless you glue it in. So this thing was certainly made to be displayed in package. I dig it more than the Casanova figure, but only because I like classical music to some degree.

I would have paid: $2.00

Skydiving Freud Figure: Now we're talking. One: I know and sort of admire Sigmund Freud. Two: I find it hilarious that there's an action figure of him, especially one that they then strapped into a parachute harness. Three: The likeness is actually kind of good.

I would have paid: $6

So that brings my total assessed value to: $32.50. That mean's we're over the $25 cost of the bag, and even covers the shipping costs. So that's cool. One last part to this series then.