Monday, June 13, 2011

X-Men First Class

My big order of Toys R US Exclusive minimates came in, so let's start with the X-Men First Class minimates. Based on the recent movie, I picked up these minimates because: Kevin Bacon as a minimate. So that's probably a good place to start. Please keep in mind that I haven't seen this movie and probably won't until it is released on DVD.

Xavier & Shaw

Both rather dull minimates. Sadly, Shaw doesn't really look that much like Kevin Bacon and his clothing sculpt has some damn sloppy paint and a lazy sculpt. The Xavier minimate does sort of look like whoever the hell plays him in the movie. Sorry, I can't be bothered to look it up in imdb. I was going to guess how many degrees away he was from Kevin Bacon, but then I realized it was 1, because they were in this freaking movie. Sometimes my mind moves slower than it should. At least they got Xavier's face right. He looks like a condescending dick and that means all is as it should be.

Magneto & Mystique

This set is a little better because it actually has an accessory, which was sorely lacking with the Xavier and Shaw set. Magento gets a helmet and a hair piece. And it's not an X-men movie if Magneto isn't accompanied by Mystique... because people loved it when she walked around naked. But in this movie she doesn't walk around naked. She's wearing an X-men uniform. And suddenly people are praising the actress who plays Mystique for being such a good actor. What are the odds, stop walking around naked and people stop ogling you and take you seriously. That's a life lesson you only get from movies people.

Beast & Azazel

I don't know what depresses me more, that they used Azazel in the movie or that his minimate is one of the better ones in this wave. If you don't know, Azazel was one of the worst ideas to be used in the X-men ever, that's all you need to know. I hear they changed him dramatically in the movie, which makes sense, because otherwise the movie would be the stupidest movie ever. I HATE HIM SO MUCH! And he comes with Beast who is blue because people can't let go of the 90's cartoon. Or maybe it's because its his iconic look. One of those. This is the other set in this wave to get an accessory, Azazel's teleport base. Because why not make him even more like Nightcrawler and remind me of the Azazel of the comic books and HE NEEDS TO BE RETCONNED AND NEVER MENTIONED AGAIN!

Emma Frost & Havok

They did it. Those bastards finally did it! They made an Emma Frost action figure that's isn't half-naked. I thought that was beyond the scope of man or god! I know there's no market for the haggard, sweat pants and loose sweater action figure variant of Emma Frost, but come on, it would be hilarious if they made one. As for Havok... I don't even want to contemplate how much it must screw up the continuity of the Summers family tree if Alex is around in the 1960s... wait, its the Summers family tree, that means it already makes no sense. So Alex in this movie could just be a time traveller, sent to the past to ensure that his parents hook up, but at the same time he will give his mother a blood transfusion that will give her the x-gene required to produce the powerful Summers children.... And you know what, that would actually be less insane than the Summers family tree in the comic books.

I'm trying to help here, Singer!

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